Monday, September 28, 2015

Am I Really The Only One That'll Miss Steve Nash?


The year was 1996. The Chicago Bulls stampeded their way to a 72-10 record while earning Michael, Scottie, and Phil their fourth championship. With Michael Jordan back from his premature retirement and back on his NBA throne, it certainly appeared that great things were on the horizon for the League. Although I don’t think anyone could have foreseen what would be arriving that summer.
 

In 1996, the NBA ushered in a class of rookies that would feature three future MVPs. One of those MVPs—also the number one overall pick in this draft—retired in 2013, which led to a piece where I gushed about his impact on the NBA culture. The 13th pick in this draft would go on to win an MVP as well, on his way to winning five NBA championships. That player is suiting up for at least one more season. However, despite the dynamic scoring prowess of those two MVPs, it would be the 15th pick of the draft that ended up walking away with the most MVP awards. That player was an unassuming 6’3” point guard out of Santa Clara University and he would go on to record the third most assists in NBA history. That player is Steve Nash, and in March 2015 he officially retired from the game of basketball. And nobody cared.



Perhaps that last sentence is a little dramatic. After all, keeping it in true Steve Nash fashion, the announcement itself was low key, an essay Nash published through the Player’s Tribune. However, even with the way he quietly left the game, it seems so strange to me that more people weren’t talking about the career of a surefire Hall of Famer. Instead, it seemed as if most people heard the news, briefly acknowledged it, and moved on with life.

A lot of this has to do with his final few seasons on the Lakers, which can only be described as a complete fucking disaster. And unfortunately, the NBA is certainly a “what have you done for me lately?” business. In Nash’s case, he is (unfairly) associated with being the catalyst that drove the Lakers to their currently abysmal state. In order to acquire the aging point guard, the Lakers traded four future draft picks and signed him to a three-year $28 million dollar contract. After suffering a broken bone in his leg during the second game of his LA tenure, Nash fell victim to numerous setbacks and a debilitating nerve injury that would cause him to miss 99 regular season games with the Lakers. To compound this, it was announced that Nash would be missing the entire 2014-2015 season after yet another setback.
 

While Nash was essentially invisible to the rest of the NBA landscape during his tumultuous tenure in Los Angeles, this shouldn’t be enough to eclipse a career that epitomized unselfishness and team play. While Mike D’Antoni is credited for revolutionizing how offenses currently play in the NBA, it simply would not have worked the same without Steve Nash as the point guard. Of course I’m referring to the famous Seven Seconds or Less Phoenix Suns teams from 2004-2010 (their last playoff appearance with Nash). It was also during this run that Nash won his back-to-back MVP awards, making him one of ten players to accomplish this in history. While I’ll admit that both MVP awards are, and were even at the time, controversial, it can’t be ignored how much Nash was able to get the most out his teammates. Hell, even while in Dallas, Nash helped drive the Nelly-ball Mavericks towards the upper echelon of the competitive Western Conference.

What people are really going to forget is the uniqueness of Steve Nash. While Nash’s passing and ability to run an offense should certainly be the first thing that comes to mind, his scoring will likely be an afterthought. If you take away his initial run in Phoenix (also plagued by injury) and his years in LA, Nash averaged 15.1 points per game while shooting about 49% from the field, an absurd 43% from three, and an “I can’t believe I’m typing this” 97% from the free throw line, over a 14 year stretch. In fact, over his entire 19 year career, Nash is the most accurate free thrower shooter of all time at 90%. While his accuracy literally almost made me fall out of my seat just now, it was how he shot the ball that people should remember. Steph Curry is currently blowing people’s mind with his ability to accurately shoot the ball while moving, which as most basketball players know is extremely difficult. However, Nash was arguably the first one to master shooting the ball in such a manner. Obviously no one has ever shot the ball from the range that Curry can, but Nash’s ability to be unpredictable and accurate with his shot was as crucial as his passing ability when running D’Antoni’s and Alvin Gentry’s offenses (I highly doubt it’s a coincidence Gentry happened to be an assistant coach for the Warriors last season while Curry was doing a very rich man’s Nash impression. It’s also not a coincidence Nash is taking on a part time coaching role with the Warriors this coming season).

Of course, Nash’s playmaking and ability to elevate his team is his defining traits, as evidenced by his 10,335 total assists, which again is good enough for the third highest total ever. While his MVP run from 2004-2006 should be considered the highlight of his career, to me, his run to the 2010 Western Conference Finals is his defining moment. At age 35, with his history of back injuries flaring up throughout the year, he managed to finally beat his nemesis, the San Antonio Spurs, and came within two victories of taking his team to the Finals, only to fall to the defending champions and his future team, the Los Angeles Lakers. During that run, Nash averaged 17.8 points, 10.1 assists, shot 51.8% from the field, and recorded a 22.4 PER. Again, at age 35. His teammates Jason Richardson and Amar’e Stoudamire seemed rejuvenated during this playoff run and no named—at the time—role players such as Jared Dudley, Goran Dragic, and Robin Lopez, would use this run to spring board towards better contacts and became valuable members of future playoff teams.  The success of those players is almost a direct result of playing with Nash. After this playoff run, Bill Simmons changed Steve’s all-time ranking in the paperback version of the The Book of Basketball, slotting him at number 35, which is one spot ahead of Allen Iverson and as the sixth best point guard behind Magic, Oscar, Cousy, Isiah, Stockton, and Walt Fraizer (and Sam Jones if you consider him a point guard. Also worth noting that book was published before the 2011 Mavericks won the championship, which likely elevated Jason Kidd’s ranking). Of course, management blew up that promising team and Steve Nash’s championship window slammed shut for good.
 

Which is maybe why we aren’t thinking about Nash as much as we should, and really points to a larger problem we have when talking about sports and great athletes. There are six MVP’s that have not won a championship: Nash, Karl Malone, Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson, Kevin Durant, and Derrick Rose. With the exception of Derrick Rose, all those other players at least played in the NBA Finals, except for Steve Nash. What’s interesting is that Barkley and Malone get somewhat of a pass because they played in the same era as Jordan. Iverson ran up against the greatest playoff team ever in the Finals and never had even a good supporting cast. KD and Rose are still currently playing, and both are on teams that can definitely make a run to the Finals. The point is all these players get some sort of a pass, so why should’t Nash? After all, he played his entire career in the Western Conference during a time where Shaq, Kobe, Duncan, and Dirk all won titles. Not to mention his best team (2007 Suns), and best chance of making the Finals, was royally screwed after Stoudamire and Boris Diaw were suspended for leaving the bench to defend Nash after Robert Horry did everything short of giving him a Stone Cold Stunner during the playoffs. Hell, even their 2010 team was a Ron Artest putback away from going up 3-2 in the series with a chance to clinch in Phoenix. Even while going against those aforementioned Hall of Famers, Nash still somehow always managed to put his team in a position to compete. Whether it was a Robert Horry hip check, or a putback layup, or an errant knee collision with Damian Lillard, it just seemed as though Steve could never catch a break.

As a Lakers fan, I totally admit that I was just as frustrated with Nash and his injuries as everyone else that followed the team. But not even that situation can allow me to dismiss an incredible career. And with only one last member of that fabled draft class remaining, I certainly gain more of an appreciation for Nash and what he managed to accomplish despite having his career nearly end before it was started. He changed the way athletes take care of their bodies, he cranked up the pace of the game, he arguably sparked the basketball revolution that’s currently brewing in Canada, and despite all of his accomplishments remained honest, humble, and a man of integrity. Steve, it’s been real, thanks for the memories.
 
Check out Steve Nash's Career Statistics and Awards



Stats, Photos, and other shit courtesy of:



The Book of Basketball by Bill Simmons (paperback)








Monday, September 21, 2015

Rappers and Ballers: Comparing NBA Players to Hip-Hop Royalty





“Rappers want to be ballers and ballers want to be rappers.”

This was the sentence that inspired this whole post. Hip-hop and basketball is a perfect marriage and it’s no coincidence that both exploded to mainstream relevance around the same time. Some players such as Allen Iverson and the Fab Five brought the edge, attitude, and fashion of rap music to the court while MC’s brought the competitiveness of the playground to the mic. Whether it’s tattoos, hairstyles, or mannerisms, hip-hop and basketball are intersecting cultures that are frequently influencing one another. One day it’s New Orleans rapper Master P making an NBA roster, the next it’s Damian Lillard setting flames on Sway in the Morning. Rap and basketball will always be one in the same, which is why it should be no surprise that there are players in the league that have enjoyed careers similar to some of rap’s most prevalent figures. When you look at it, you realize that…

Dwight Howard is Lil Wayne
 

From like 2007-2009, Lil Wayne was a rap demi-god. He seemed almost superhuman, appearing on seemingly every hit radio single while producing mixtapes at an unreal pace. Fueled by copious amounts of lean and weed, Weezy embraced a free association style that allowed him to redefine the term “wordplay”. Every verse was like a personal assault on the English language. His run atop of the rap game is truly unprecedented.   

Much like Lil Wayne, Dwight Howard began his career as a child prodigy, chosen number 1 overall fresh out of high school. After a couple of seasons, Howard was able to combine a Marvel-esque physique with freakish athleticism to be crowned the best big man in basketball, similarly to how Wayne was proclaimed the best rapper alive.

A lot has changed since then. For starters, both experienced setbacks that turned these superhumans back into mortals (back surgery for Howard and a little thing called prison for Lil Wayne). While we occasionally hear Weezy spaz on a track, or see Howard slap up a 20-20 during the playoffs, it’s evident that these guys are not the same as they used to be. Some of this is attributed to alleged personality traits that hold them back. In Dwight’s case, people started questioning his will to win and his commitment to the game of basketball. For Wayne, it was his alarming dependency on substances, which is inadvertently the focus of the fascinating documentary Tha Carter.

Whether being physically removed from their professions or their personalities derailing their limitless ascensions, it can’t be ignored that the game has changed for both of them. In Howard’s case, the game is rapidly moving towards the perimeter, where the most dominate players on the floor are guards and swingmen. The need for a post player with very limited range and mediocre passing abilities is nearly non-existent. For Lil Wayne, mainstream hip-hop returned to the narrative driven style from the early 90’s. While Wayne has found refuge in the “trap music” genre of rap, his “punchline” rapping style seems almost childish compared to what the up and coming rappers are producing, including his label-mate, Drake. Like I said, there are moments where we’re reminded how good these guys once were, but their peak definitely belongs to the 2007-2010 era.


Tim Duncan is Nas
 

You know what the problem is with being consistent? After a while you get labeled as boring and it takes something truly spectacular to garner attention, despite the fact you’re constantly cranking out excellence. In hip-hop and in basketball, no one has maintained an exceptional level of consistency over a long period of time like Tim Duncan and Nas. In 1994, the world was introduced to a 19 year old MC from Queensbridge, New York and arguably the greatest hip-hop album of all time, Illmatic. Three years later, the San Antonio Spurs drafted arguably the greatest power forward of all time in Tim Duncan. For those that aren’t great at math, that’s two decades worth of waking up in the morning and pissing excellence (OK, 18 years in Duncan’s case but still).
 


In that span, Duncan has racked up five championships, three Finals MVPs, two regular season MVPs, and 10 First team All-NBA selections (15 total!). Meanwhile, Nas has released ten solo albums (7 reached platinum certification), three collaboration albums (The Firm: The Album achieved platinum), and a few side projects such as The Lost Tapes and the controversially titled, The Nigger Tape. Despite their accolades, Nas and Duncan are in a unique class of greatness. Throughout their careers, they’ve been overshadowed by their flashier rivals. This led to a sentiment that only the hardcore fans or the “purists” could appreciate them. And in a sense, that is true. What makes Duncan and Nas special is their attention to detail and dedication to the fundamentals. The same way Duncan fluidly maneuvered his feet and nailed bank shots, Nas blended the grittiness of the street with intellectual poetry. If you are the type of fan looking for dunks and club music, these guys probably weren’t for you.

Kobe Bryant is Jay-Z


I feel like I’m almost cheating with this one because the parallels are almost too easy. For starters, both Hov and the Mamba debuted in 1996 and have dominated headlines ever since. When it comes to style, finesse, arrogance, competiveness, and a nearly offensive excess of wealth, there are few like Kobe and Jay. Obviously, both of these guys are going to be regarded as some of the greatest to ever lace the mic or sneakers. But when it comes to an evaluation of their legacies, there’s three types of people that make the following arguments: A) He is my favorite and therefore the greatest of all time! B) Great resume but far from perfect and definitely not the best. C) Vastly overrated and a cheap imitation of his predecessor.
 

Group C fascinates me mostly because there’s a similarity between Jordan and the Notorious Big that does hurt Kobe and Jay’s legacy: they both left something on the table and let our imaginations form the rest of the narrative. Jordan left basketball at the absolute peak of his powers in 1993, only to return towards the end of the 1995 season. Many argue that the Houston Rockets would not have won those two titles in his absence and that MJ could be looking at possibly 8 straight championships (the counterargument here is that Jordan desperately needed his baseball sabbatical for numerous reasons and without that there’s a chance he wouldn’t have had enough in the tank for the second three peat). And of course, Biggie fucking died before his second album was even released. While there’s questions of what could have been, there is nothing left to wonder with Jay and Kobe because they’ve already done everything. There’s very little they could do that would surprise any of us. And because of this, group B is the most on point because we can see the whole resume. Had they retired when the public expected them to (after the Black Album/ after Kobe's torn Achilles) then their legacies would be held in even higher regard. 

Steph Curry is Kendrick Lamar


If I had to describe both of these cats in one word it would be “combustible”. These two humans embody the ever present threat of transforming into supernovas and destroying everything in sight. Whether it’s hitting shots from anywhere on the court or hijacking the song with a guest verse, no one can heat up faster than Kendrick Lamar and Steph Curry. What’s dope about watching/ listening to these two is you can sense when they are about to capture the moment. Kendrick has that young Eminem ability to shift gears throughout a song, and as he crescendos into his fifth gear you can’t help but metaphorically buckle up. In Steph’s case, much like Kendrick, it seems that his greatest moments occur when he is tiptoeing the line between “mind-bending-genius” and “about-to-fly-off-the-rails-recklessness”. Seriously, right when it seems like Steph has reached the point of being completely out of control, he somehow reels it in to achieve an incredible feat.


Like everyone else on this list, their main similarity is where they rank in their respective fields. And really what I mean by that is the subjective nature of determining this. While a lot of people want to declare them the best at what they do, there is something that is holding us back from making that definitive. I’m not sure what that is entirely but if I had to guess, it’s the sense that we feel they still have something to prove. Sure, Curry was the MVP and champion this season, and Good Kid M.A.A.D City is a legitimate hip-hop classic, but for some reason we feel that we need to see more out of them, especially since the kings of their fields are still active and lurking (we’ll get to them).

I think the best way to classify these two is the best right now, which is in no way a sign of disrespect. Like I said earlier, there’s genuine excitement generated as soon as they step on the mic/ court. Maybe Steph will explode for 50 points, maybe Kendrick will pull another Control verse out of his ass, who knows! That’s what makes these dudes captivating, at any given moment they can be the undisputed best. However, how many of these moments does it take to become the king of their industries?

James Harden is Drake


Let’s get the obvious differences out of the way: When it comes to beard strength, Harden easily beats Drake. When it comes to winning beefs against rappers, Drizzy has had much better luck (Harden lost to Lil B for Christ sake). In a situation where they are both in a layup line, Harden would definitely fare better than the artist formerly known as Jimmy.

Outside of that, these guys share plenty in common, to the point where this was the first comparison I thought of. Outside of their mutual appreciation for strippers, both Harden and Drake have risen to the top of their respective game. Both started gaining notoriety around 2009-2010 when Harden was selected third overall in the 2009 draft and Drake dropped the mixtape So Far Gone. Playing in the shadows of stars Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook—and to a lesser extent, Serge Ibaka—Harden still managed to shine as an assassin off the bench, winning Sixth Man of the Year in 2012. During that same stretch, Drake started rising through the ranks of Young Money Cash Money, but was mostly an afterthought after megastar Lil Wayne, CEO and professional hand-rubber Birdman, and fellow rising star Nicki Minaj.
As we all know, Harden was infamously traded to the Houston Rockets, which resulted in him skyrocketing overnight into the MVP conversation. For Drizzy, it was almost destiny. After Lil Wayne went to prison and Kanye did his absolute best to burn every bridge with the public, there was a noticeable void in rap and Drake, to his credit, exploited the fuck out of it. But he wasn’t the only one that took advantage of a changing landscape.

If I absolutely had to boil down the similarities between Drake and James Harden, it’s this: They are both at the top of their profession despite being the most polarizing individuals in their arena. In this case, polarizing is a polite way of saying annoying as fuck. In Harden’s case, it’s his maddeningly efficient hybrid-Eurostep move that draws fouls at a rate that could drive a man to drink. For Drake it’s, umm, shit, why didn’t we like Drake again? Was it the light-skinned thing? Because he’s Canadian? Because he smiles entirely way too much?
Seriously, stop with all the damn smiling!

Oh, right! It’s because he was, to use his own words in Back 2 Back, “a singing nigga”. Drake wasn’t seen as a real rapper because a lot of his tracks, especially from the Take Care days, are more r&b influenced, which is a nice way of saying soft. Much like how people thought his singing negated his rap abilities, many dismissed Harden as a legitimate superstar because he “flopped” his way to the free-throw line time and time again. But here’s the thing, to bring the point full circle, these two dudes are maddeningly annoying to only the older generation of fans that use standards from their eras to define greatness. The reasons why they get on our nerves is also the reason why they are extremely successful. Really these guys are just ahead of their time and more and more people are starting to model their success after their blueprint. The NBA has a boner for hyper-efficient players that shoot only threes, layups, and free-throws, and no one is better at that trifecta than Harden. If you turn on your radio, it seems like every rap song, even goddamn trap music, is mostly singing. Hell, a great example of this is Big Sean’s album Dark Sky Paradise, which is an album that I thoroughly enjoyed, but if you take a closer listen, you realize it sounds exactly like a Drake album. While these guys are on the inside track to become the best, that simply isn’t the case right now.

LeBron James is Kanye West
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Despite what was said about Harden/Curry/ Drake/ Kendrick, all roads still go through LeBron James and Kanye West. If you don’t believe that these guys aren’t at the tippy top of their industries then you’re either a hater or delusional. To prove my point, let’s run through a checklist of what it takes to be considered the best:

·         Are you the one of the most popular individuals yet simultaneously despised for little to no reason?

·         Does everyone in the industry want to work with you?

·         Do you selflessly make underqualified individuals look much, much better?

·         Are you a global icon and a walking brand?

·         Do you routinely break records?

·         When performing at 75% are you still better than basically everyone else? When you do go 100% is it even disputable that you’re the best?

·         Does your resume carry significant weight when viewed in a historical context?

Ye and Bron nail all of these. Besides maybe Dr. Dre, no producer is more sought after than Kanye West. Rappers like Lil Wayne, 2 Chainz, Big Sean, Kid Cudi, and even Hov, all leap to another level when they jump on a Kanye track. And contrary to popular belief, Kanye is usually gracious enough to take a backseat to make those individuals look better than him on the track. LeBron’s track record for turning scrubs into NBA Finals participants is Jordan-esque. I mean, he got the national media to talk exhaustively about fucking Matthew Dellavedova! That’s amazing. Because of this, LeBron is the player everyone wants to play with in the NBA. And like Yeezy, he’s more than willing to let his teammates eat. But when these two decide to flip the switch and remind people how good they are, they transform into once in a lifetime talents. When talking about the NBA or hip-hop in a historical context, there’s absolutely no way you can leave these guys out.

Even the narratives line up. They both came into the game when their slightly older contemporaries were in full control of the game (Jay-Z and Kobe) and immediately rose to prominence after their rookie efforts dropped (College Dropout/ LeBron’s rookie season). Within the next few years, they became household names, dropping performances that in retrospect seem underappreciated (Late Registration/ the 2007 Finals appearance). Then came, what appeared to be at the time, their crowning achievements and official arrival as the leaders of their industry (Graduation/ back to back MVPs). This was the time where they were at the peak of their popularity, but not quite the masters of their craft. Their otherworldly strengths (production/ explosiveness) covered up their subtle weaknesses (LeBron’s jump shooting and competitiveness/ Kanye’s lyrical ability, which I know I’m going to catch flack for but he really isn’t that great of a rapper). That is until they combined a lackluster performance with decisions that resulted in a PR nightmare (808 and Heartbreaks and the Taylor Swift incident/ The Decision and the 2011 Finals). That brief period resulted in these greats becoming outcasts almost overnight. Their aforementioned weaknesses became the focus of their narratives and allowed for the public to devalue their overall abilities and worth. That is until they unleashed the run of a lifetime and achieved their true peaks (My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy and Watch the Throne/ back to back championships and an Olympic medal). MBDTF is the definition of a perfect album and Watch the Throne is a beast of its own. On the flip side, LeBron put up better numbers during his first stint in Cleveland, but the Miami version of LeBron is arguably one of the top five players of all time. He filled the holes in his game and became, as I like to joke, a Super Saiyan.

Whether you like these guys or not, there’s no denying that on their best days they are still champions of their fields.
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Wednesday, September 16, 2015

What's Going On With These Jerseys?

By Matt Lyons

When I was in middle school, I was your typical white kid from a lower-middle income family in a small town. I played on sports teams that were successful… against other small town teams, I definitely texted people with Verizon too much from my Sprint account (causing their bill to skyrocket), and I LOVED My Chemical Romance. Does anybody remember the title of the album that was huge for MCR?

“It’s Not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Death wish”

Why do I bring back such angsty and emo feelings for us all? Because the new NBA uniforms that continue to be released are some of the worst pieces of fashion I’ve seen since untied Etnies and carrying Walkman cd players around. Here are a few of the horrible ideas I have seen for uniforms for the upcoming season:



Along with the Clippers new logo, these jerseys scream 5th seed for the next 4 years and no legitimate chance at a title. Why? Because no team or fan can take a team seriously that allows Austin Rivers to wear this--let alone suit up at all--as he gets too many minutes and takes too many shots. 



At first, the Hawks jerseys were kind of cool to me. I like the half triangle thing they have to make them shiny. Overall, the main thing I see with these uniforms is that they are too desperate to try and look like an Oregon football concept jersey. Bright numbers, shiny material, and something that will try to make Tiago Splitter appear fast, just does not work for the Hawks. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Kyle Korver who owns the white man’s motto of “I’ll dunk when it’s worth 3 points”, but I just think this looks like what McDonalds would try to make a Big Mac box look like in 2030. They should have consulted Jermaine Dupri before releasing these. 






No comment needed.


Now, there are some jerseys I do like for the upcoming year. The Bucks are perfect for a team that is making the move to Seattle in the future (I’m desperate for the Bucks; bring me the Greek Freak, please).


Look at these jerseys. They are so simple and clean. Milwaukee knows their place in the NBA. That place is "don’t make too much noise because we’re going to sneak up on everybody while OJ Mayo has a career revival."

Or not

Overall, it seems the theme for new uniforms is to have block letters with little curves, if any at all. With all of the Western Conference teams getting healthy, both the Rockets and Clippers have a death wish of divisional round losses. 

GO BUCKS

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Friday, September 11, 2015

The Most Intriguing Players Part 2


As you noticed in part 1 of this series, the NBA season is actually coming up pretty quick. Which means it’s time to start hammering out previews to get you ready for the coming year. As customary of this blog, introductions are like foreplay and that shit is for gentlemen. I am not a gentleman. In other words, we’re jumping right in, and no we will not cuddle afterwards.

Kevin Durant

As mentioned in part 1, Kevin Durant will be returning to action after missing most of the season with a Jones fracture in his right foot. The absence of the 2014 NBA MVP had a seismic impact on the league as Steph Curry, ex-teammate James Harden, current teammate Russell Westbrook, and Anthony Davis, competed in a memorable race for the MVP award (along with forgotten vets Chris Paul and LeBron James). Without Durant, the Thunder—most people’s preseason pick to win the West—narrowly missed the playoffs. This led to multiple personnel moves, including hiring Florida’s coach Billy Donovan.

And look, we could waste a bunch of time talking about how foot injuries have derailed the careers of multiple Hall of Fame big men (looking at you Bill Walton and Yao Ming). We can talk about how the Already-Damn-Near-Impossible Western Conference has beefed back up with the Thunder in the mix. We can even discuss how KD is quietly fulfilling my Jerry West prophecy. But none of that shit is important because only one story is going to dominate Sportscenter for the next year: Kevin Durant is going to be a free agent next summer.

If you remember the summer of 2010, which I don’t because I spent most of it blacked out on post-Lakers celebratory bliss, you may recall a little thing called the Decision. What you may not remember is the season long build up to the LeBron free agency frenzy. Namely, everyone freaking out and overreacting to every little thing LeBron and the Cavs did or didn’t do. Every moment of poor body language or after every bad loss (which didn’t happen often for that Cleveland squad) resulted in reckless speculation that LeBron was going to New York/ Miami/ Chicago/ Los Angeles. The rumor mill swelled to epidemic proportions after the infamous Boston meltdown and even more so after the Delonte West incident.
 
[Insert hilarious Yo Mama joke here]

Now, I highly doubt that we’re going to hear reports of Reggie Jackson being traded because he messed around with Mama Durant, but the point is that the Thunder are going to be under a HUGE microscope this season. You can bet money that every game where Westbrook takes 30 shots is going to result in Stephan A. Smith and Skip Bayless busting blood vessels debating where KD is going to take his talents next season. On top of that, the league is about to see a gigantic boom in the salary cap which means pretty much every team, except the hilariously incompetent Kings, will have a legitimate chance to sign Durant. To further add to this, the Thunder’s past is going to definitely rear its head as we’re reminded that they’re ruthlessly cheap, they never surrounded KD with the right role players, and that they traded away their third best player after making it to the Finals in exchange for a bunch of dudes that are no longer on the roster.


Is KD going to go back home to DC to play with John Wall? Kobe is about to retire, is this the summer the Lakers get their new franchise player?! Can the Miami Heat pull another coup and bring KD to South Beach?!?! Are the Thunder going to panic trade Westbrook?!?!! Is God going to decide he no longer hates the Knicks?!!!?!?!?!?! ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!!! This shit is about to be a circus. Get your Twitter accounts ready and enjoy the show.

Karl-Anthony Towns/ Jahlil Okafor/ D’Angelo Russell

The top three picks of this summer’s draft class are all interesting for different reasons. Let’s start with Towns. Obviously the number one pick is going to garner interest, especially when he is joining a roster that includes the past two consecutive number one picks (Wiggins and Bennett). I’m going to go out on a limb and say has never happened before in history. The Timberwolves are crazy young but they boast the most intriguing and promise filled roster in the league. Now, Towns is likely going to experience some growing pains as he adjusts to the NBA game, but there are a couple of factors that make a Rookie of the Year campaign a reasonable expectationfor him. First is his pedigree. Kentucky big men, such as Anthony Davis and Boogie Cousins, have entered the league and immediately started dominating. After watching Towns obliterate opponents in limited minutes at Kentucky, it’s safe to assume he’ll eventually live up to the standard set by his predecessors. You know what’s going to help accelerate that progress? The fact that he will be under the wing of professional lunatic Kevin Garnett. While the perception of Garnett is that he’s a ruthless asshole, it can’t be ignored that he is highly revered in the league for being a consummate professional, one of the hardest workers in the offseason, and one of the most beloved teammates in the game. There’s only one other player in the league I would rather have mentoring Towns, but he’s going to be busy mentoring an establish All-Star in San Antonio.


Unlike Towns, D’Angelo Russell, the second overall pick of the draft, will learn the game under the watchful eye of a player that has likely never been described as a beloved teammate. Learning the game under Kobe Bryant is daunting and probably no fun whatsoever, but if there’s any rookie from the draft ready for that challenge, it’s Russell. However, the real challenge for Russell is going to be living up to expectations IMMEDIATELY. Most rookies taken in the lottery have the luxury of being slowly broken into the league. For example, while Towns is expected to be a franchise player in the future, he isn’t expected to single handily carry the Wolves to the playoffs this year. If anything, that’s going to be Andrew Wiggins’ job. Sixers fans are so drunk off the Sam Hinkie Kool-Aid that Jahlil Okafor could have the worst season of his life (or God forbid, suffer a season ending injury) and they aren’t going to care. Lakers fans are not nearly as patient and they expect to be championship contenders every year. Of course, we all forget that it took Kobe four seasons to become a genuine superstar and last time I checked Byron Scott isn’t Phil Jackson. Watching Russell work his way to “Next Kobe” status will be worth paying attention to.

And then there’s the aforementioned Jahlil Okafor, whom I just feel bad for. After spending most of the year being hyped as the number 1 pick, he went on to lead the Duke Blue Devils to the NCAA championship, only to be passed over twice for the “sexier” options. And really that’s what it came down to. Towns and Russell are more explosive and have more upside potential than Okafor, even though Jahlil is the most skilled player in maybe the entire draft. Now that he has that chip on his shoulder, he will head to the basketball wasteland known as Philly and somehow mesh with former lottery big men Nerlens Noel and Joel Embiid.


This is the look of a man that is as disappointed and perplexed as we are

To borrow from a wise philosopher, the 76ers, “have got me fucked up” and here’s why: every move they make is an obvious recipe for disaster, yet it all makes so much damn sense! Think about it, every move they have made has been justifiable and you could easily tell yourself, “Okay, I can see why they did that.” They are building towards the future and those moves help fulfill that goal. Until you take a step back and remember they have been doing this shit for what feels like half a decade and don’t have much to show for it. Is Okafor going to suddenly get them 15 more wins next season? Well shit, maybe, but only because the East is awful. But as mentioned earlier, they are expecting Embiid to basically be Okafor mixed with Nerlens' defensive chops. In other words, someone is getting traded as soon as this season.

I don’t know, I can’t necessarily blame Philly for picking the best available player, even if he plays the same position as two other young players on the roster. At the same time though, I doubt anyone would have called them crazy for picking the most intriguing rookie of the draft…

EMMANUEL FUCKING MUDIAY

You have to throw a fucking in the middle of his name, because he could very well end up being the best player of the draft. During the Return of the Mailbag, here was my breakdown of Mudiay:

If you don’t know who he is, trust me, you do. But like the rest of us you forgot he was at one time considered the best prospect of the draft, only he bailed on playing at SMU and decided to play overseas. While I have no thoughts on that whole fiasco, I also have no thoughts on him at all considering no one has gotten a chance to see him play. So maybe he’ll be good? Who knows.



Super thorough analysis, I know. But the world finally got to see him play during the Summer League and realized that maybe spending a year in China benefitted him more than a year playing against college kids. I don’t doubt that Mudiay is going to be good, but I am very interested in how good he’s going to be this season, and namely how is that going to start impacting high school seniors? A couple of players have made this transition to the league with Brandon Jennings being the most notable.  Which is cool? I guess, but it doesn’t compare to how the players coming from Lexington have been equally, if not more, ready for the pros than their peers that choose to play overseas first. Perhaps Mudiay can change this thinking.

Yes this is the most intriguing rookie coming into the season. Yes I’m not going to write much about him. I’m going to continue cultivating the mystique by keeping this section short.

And moving on to more important matters. Like getting shitfaced

Jason Kidd

Don’t look now, but the Bucks are quietly putting together a fucking squad and it’s pretty clear what Jason Kidd is trying to accomplish with this squad: Golden State Warriors of the East. Now, I don’t know if it’s scientifically possible to replicate the shooting prowess the Warriors demonstrated last season. It also doesn’t help that Michael Carter-Williams is on the opposite end of the shooting spectrum as Steph Curry. With that said, the Warriors became kings of the NBA thanks to a shape shifting defense that featured a majority of their players having the ability to guard multiple positions.

Very, very sneaky

The Bucks might not have a transcending defender like Draymond Green, but they do have a ridiculous amount of length. Their starting lineup could feature 6’6”, 6’8”, 6’8”, 6’11”, and 6’11”. Now two of those spots could be taken up Greg Monroe and Jabari Parker, whom are not exactly known as defensive stalwarts, but that lineup does include Carter-Williams at the point guard and Giannas Antetokounmpo at pretty much any position Kidd feels like playing him (by the way, I’m as big of a Greek Freak fan as one can be, but god DAMN! It is exhausting trying to spell his name right. I might seriously start looking for reasons not to write about him just so I can avoid that name. Ok you caught me, I love him too much not to write about him).
Parker (6'8") could wind up playing PF with Giannis (6'11") playing SF

Like I was saying, Draymond Green has an innate ability to lockdown multiple positions that is unique to pretty much only him and LeBron. But if Kidd, whom has built a reputation around being a defensive coach, can figure out how to implement Green’s court awareness and defensive IQ with Giannis’ sprawling frame then HOLY SHIT. And I didn’t even mention that this team has John Henson, a 6’11” rim protector that has Stretch Armstrong arms. Combine that with the offensive boasts a healthy Jabari and Monroe can provide? Milwaukee could become the breakout team in the East (translation: they’ll win more than half their games, which is a big deal in that conference).
 
 
 
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